I left you for a reason, ​and I’m done playing games

Two years ago I broke up with my ex boyfriend. The whole thing was a traumatic mess, to be honest, throughout the relationship it was a constant battle on which one of us was succeeding and which one of us was better than the other. It wasn’t meant to be, we weren’t the right people for each other and we just didn’t click. Yet there’s a whole load of things that I learnt from this relationship and I’ll share some with you in case you’re in the same position

This is the first thing that I struggled with the most, it was hard to be with someone I didn’t love but it was even harder to be without someone at all. There were friends around me that were in the most gorgeous loved up relationships and I just couldn’t do it at all, it was hard and I didn’t want to share the person I was supposed to love with them because I didn’t love him but at the same time if I was on my own that was worse. When I broke free, it wasn’t as bad as I thought it was, it was better to be on my own and learn to love my own company than with someone else. I never cheated, that’s one thing to be perfectly clear about but I didn’t love him. I could have carried on pretending but it wasn’t the type of person that I wanted to be.

The second thing was that emotional abuse is a serious thing and if you don’t feel good when you’re around someone and they make you feel like you’re fat and ugly and the worst person in the whole entire world then they’re not the person for you. You deserve to feel good with someone and it wasn’t until I was in a good relationship that I realised that I deserve to be treated with respect.

Finally, I learnt don’t be in a relationship for the sake of being in a relationship.

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